Any other perfectionists (or "recovering perfectionists") out there?
In high school I remember calling myself a competitive perfectionist and being proud of it. I say those words now and I want to gag. Who has time to compete with yourself about doing everything perfect?
Maybe in my idyllic high school head or world, I felt I had the time to take on the world through a perfectionist lens. But people, it's exhausting. And it's a recipe for disaster. For me anyways.
The need to "be perfect" in high school sent me on a track to be over-involved in everything I could possibly join or lead so that I wasn't learning how to take care of myself the right way and I wasn't caring for others like I should. I was on a "path to success" with that 4.0 GPA, over-involvement in everything and learning so many wrong things about how I needed to look and be. It definitely messed me up for a few years as I couldn't love myself or anything I did that didn't reach this invisible standard I drew for myself.
Now let's be honest, high school was a long time ago for me. Many people might say "Move on girl" or "That has nothing to do with your reality right now". And for the most part, it doesn't. I am happy to say that I've been able to let go of that need to "be perfect." I'm way more healthy when it comes to taking care of myself now than I was 15 years ago.
And I've been hearing this phrase "DONE IS BETTER THAN PERFECT" over and over again during the last month and I LOVE IT.
Because life is too short to be comparing ourselves to others all the time. It's too short to be trying to be perfect. I know when I scroll through my Insta feed or facebook, it looks like a lot of perfect moments have been captured on film. I also know that thanks to our phones and many people's endless storage there are also 10 imperfect photos for every perfect one that gets posted. (Or is that just me?)
Part of my full-time job involves traveling to lead and present at conferences around the world teaching how to integrate technology into the classroom and empowering teachers to step up and embrace their invaluable position at influencing the next generation.
As I travel (sometimes with kids - blog coming on that beautiful chaotic adventure), I get to have amazing conversations and hear incredible keynotes. Last week, I loved hearing Tracy Poelzer talk about the "Imposter Syndrome." (Definition: Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostorism, fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".)
Anybody else feel like an imposter all the time? I know I do! Whether I'm presenting, momming, traveling, cooking, leading...you name it, I doubt myself.
"The voice inside your head is the one you spend the most time with in your life." -Tracy Poelzer. Boom. That truth is so good. So powerful. What are we telling ourselves on a daily basis? As a mom and recovering perfectionist I need to remember it's ok to not live a Pinterest perfect life and just live in the moment. I should be enjoying the laughs we have at our house, forget about the mess for a bit and be ok with "Done is better than perfect."
Another truth Tracy shared is this quote from Jon Acuff "Don't compare your beginning to someone else's middle." And that's so unbelievably wise. How much time have I wasted comparing my beginning's to someone else's success?
Even as I write this blog, there's an internal struggle, "Why even write this? Someone has already said this better. I need to learn how to put my thoughts on paper more concisely. I can't believe I'm sharing a blog with so few posts, it's kinda embarrassing....." and my thoughts can keep going if I let them.
But sometimes in life, you just need to do something. You just need to be in the moment. And done is better than perfect. For me, it's been therapeutic for me to get my jumbled thoughts out and it feels good to share what I'm learning in this crazy journey called life.
So maybe this resonates with you and maybe not, but remember "just do something." Stop trying to be perfect. Be nice to yourself, you're stuck with you and your voice in your head for the rest of your days...what you say to yourself matters.
And though this blog post isn't perfect, it's done, and that's the point.