What they see and hear

Max has always been into playing with cars, trains, planes or anything with wheels. He's super imaginative when it comes to playing. We had never really seen him interested in drawing anything beyond his interpretation of a bulldozer or truck.


Last week was Open House at Max's preschool, and as a former teacher, it was so fun being on the "parent's side" of things compared to the "teacher's side." After we listened to the teachers tell us more about their systems and routines, they told us that each child had left us a drawing in their cubby.


Max has never drawn anything for us, so we were excited to see his first piece of art.


It is a picture of "Mama" and "Papa" hugging.

Well it may seem insignificant to many, it melted my heart. Of all the things that he could have drawn for us, he drew a "hug". I love that he sees his mommy and daddy giving hugs. And that he sees that we love each other.


Because I for one, know there are times we say things to one another that we shouldn't. And that Max hears that. I know that there are times I feel way too tired, stressed or overwhelmed and I'm not the best me I can be.


But his little eyes chose to not draw how I may normally feel and he drew a "hug".


I can't help but think of our first year as being parents, when our marriage was in jeopardy because we couldn't get along or even think straight with so little sleep. We fought all the time. It was not pretty. There was not a lot of hugging happening. And our poor little baby boy was often in the middle of the mean words and selfish actions both his mommy and daddy were taking.


We are in such a better place right now. We are not perfect and far from it. But thankfully we get along and there's a lot more peace in our lives. Our struggle those 15 months has made us stronger and more appreciative for what we have. We know we are blessed. And when life was ugly and we felt like giving up on our marriage, it was other couples in our life who lifted us up. Friends who listened and encouraged us, our pastors who came to our house when we were both in tears and couldn't agree on anything. It was crying out to God and finding hope in Bible verses I hadn't thought about in years.


As a result of that experience, we love meeting with other couples and strengthening our relationship by helping others. Every other week we have a marriage small group at our house. Not because we are experts, but more because we know that community is important and we wouldn't be together today if it wasn't for an amazing community of people that helped us through some dark days.


All that to say, take time for some hugs. Be thankful for grace. Because as tired, stressed and overwhelmed as we may be, when we're in a relationship we have to be a team. And those of us that are parents, we have little eyes observing it all.


What they see and hear is what they will remember. So here's to many more moments of love.


And lots of hugs. 

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